WrestleMania 23 Predictions (by Audrey).

1 04 2007

WrestleMania Predictions (by my dog).

Instead of giving you a standard WrestleMania prediction column, I am going to shake things up. I asked my dog, Audrey, to chose the winner of each match of WrestleMania 23. How do you ask a dog to choose? Well, a simple and unscientific method was necessary. I took a memo pad, wrote the name of the competitors on opposite sides of the paper (I consistently placed champions on the left side of the paper). Then I placed a dog treat under each person’s name. Audrey sat and watched. I told her to “pick one.” The first one she chose, I figured was the one she picked. Let’s get to it:

Batista vs. Undertaker: Audrey’s pick — Undertaker. I agree with the dog. I think she picked a winner. Undertaker’s undefeated streak is something I don’t think will be broken — especially by someone as old as Batista.

John Cena vs. HBK: Audrey’s pick — John Cena. Another situation where I agree with the dog. This will be an excellent match because HBK will get the best out of Cena. Also, Cena can really tell a story. Cena is McMahon’s golden boy and should win. (I think Cena is undefeated at ‘Mania, too. Why should he start losing now?).

Lashley vs. Umaga: When I wrote on the paper “McMahon | Trump,” Audrey picked McMahon. I was shocked by this pick. I gave her another go. I wrote “Lashley | Umaga.” Then she picked Lashley. I figured she picked McMahon because she though McMahon would lose his hair. So far, I agree with every pick she made.

Money in the Bank: Audrey’s Pick — CM Punk (2nd Pick: Edge). This was a shocker. I took note of her 2nd pick because of the amount of competitors in this match. I don’t believe that CM Punk will win, but then again, I didn’t think that Lashley would be ECW Champion so early in his career. I figure Edge will win again because he’s got the 2nd most high profile WrestleMania undefeated streak.

ECW Originals vs. New Breed: Audrey’s Pick — New Breed. No one in my house picked the ECW Originals to win. I asked my wife about the match and she didn’t know 6 out of 8 of the competitors. I asked, “Do you think that the WWE will let RVD win in his home state of Michigan?” She answered, “No. New Breed will win, then.”

Melina vs. Ashley: I feel bad for a lot of wrestlers that are not on the card (Ric Flair, Carlito, Shelton Benjamin, Charlie Haas, Johnny Nitro, Kenny Doane, Chavo, Kendrick and London, Jimmy Yang, Greg Helms, and maybe William Regal) while Ashley has a championship shot. We all know that Mickie James or Victoria should get the title shot because they can actually wrestle. Audrey’s pick — Melina. I agree with Audrey, I think that Melina should win, but I think that Ashley will win because it will continue the feud to Unforgiven.

Kane vs. Khali: Audrey’s pick — Kane. I found this pick surprising since it is rumored that Kane is going to take some time off after WrestleMania. Maybe Audrey thinks that the WWE will let Kane have a win and then take some time off. I figure that Khali will win because the WWE always screws Kane.

Benoit vs. MVP: Audrey’s pick — Chris Benoit. I guess Audrey does not see a lot of title changes for this WrestleMania. I figure that Benoit is repeating his role as temporary U.S. champion (he lost the title to JBL last year, why not lose it again to MVP?). I’m picking MVP.

That’s it for WrestleMania Predictions. Even though it doesn’t seem like the best WrestleMania card ever, I think it will be a fun show where every wrestler performs their best. This is WrestleMania — the biggest PPV of the year. There will be some great wrestling, some great mania, and plenty of fun.





SummerSlam 2006

16 08 2006

SummerSlam is upon us and I really have no interest in paying for this pay-per-view.

As I was driving my car listening to Metalingus by Alter Bridge (Edge’s theme), I realized I want to see a couple of the matches on the card. I don’t care about the Rey/Chavo storyline. I’m sure the two will put on an excellent match, but I can always watch their No Way Out Cruiserweight Championship Match (the same No Way Out where Eddie become WWE Champion) if I want to see them wrestle.

DX vs. The McMahons – I’ve got some words for you: I don’t care. I understand that “Mr. McMahon” is a character and will have feuds from time to time, but I have no interest in watching Vince wrestle. I would rather Vince act as a manager of sorts where he sends out wrestlers to take on other wrestlers.

Hogan vs. Orton: The Second Legend vs. Legend Killer match for SummerSlam (last year was Taker vs. Randy). Orton had a decent match against Taker and had a great match against Chris Benoit (but then again, Benoit could wrestle a broom) but I don’t think he can get a good match out of Hogan. It will be a punch, kick, rest-hold-fest that I don’t want to watch. I expect Orton to prevail since he’s got a 2 SummerSlam win-streak and I also expect Hogan is willing to do the job for the promotion of his daughter.

The “I Quit” match, bleh. I know these guys can go and have a brutal match, but once again, my interest is low. Foley’s promos have been excellent – but once again, these guys are old enough to start their own stables. These stables could fight. Foley’s Stuntmen vs. Flair’s Non-horsemen.

I’m only interested in the championship matches considering it determines the main storylines on the shows. I’ve been enjoying seeing Edge as WWE Champion and I think Cena is doing well as the babyface challenger chasing the heel champion. (BTW, I think Edge should retain because that guy is getting great heel heat and looks like he could lose to any challenger. Once again, he reminds me of Ric Flair as a mouthy, chicken, heel.) Since SummerSlam is in MA and Cena’s the hometown boy (plus he’s the WWE’s golden boy) I expect Cena to win his 3rd WWE Championship.

I’ve enjoyed King Booker’s reign as well. He had me cracking up when he was on commentary duty last week and I hope he keeps the king character for a bit longer. The King’s Court is a good loose heel stable which gives purpose to matches. (Such as if someone has a problem with Booker, they go through his court first. It separates the challenger from the champion).

Show vs. Sabu can be pretty good – and I’m sure I’ll get my fill through free recaps on ECW.

So that’s my look at SummerSlam 2006.








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